I was so caught. And I immediately knew it as soon as I saw the cop sitting off the road and then looked down to see that I was going 65+ in a 45 mph zone.
Within a 15 second time span, the following went through my mind:
- I am so getting a Starbucks Grande Chai Tea Frappuccino with extra whipped cream after this.
- Where the hell is the registration and insurance card?
- I will probably pull off at the side entrance to the gas station after the light. Yeah, make the sucker cop follow me for a few yards.
- I wonder how long I can keep this from my husband? Does he really ever have to know?
- Yeah, I was speeding, but what excuse could I make up? Ah hell, I am PMS-ing so badly this morning that I KNOW anything I say is just going to make it worse.
- My “no speeding ticket in a mini-van” theory is all shot to hell.
And so, as soon as I passed Mr. Policeman in his police car, he immediately pulled out behind me.
“One, two, three…” I waited for the lights to come on as I monitored my rear view mirror.
“Come on already!” I muttered under my breath. I wanted my damn Starbucks sooner rather than later.
“Whaa?!? Huh? WTF!?! YESSSSS!” And with that, Mr. Policeman turned left at the light and left me on my merry way.
So all is well in Lori’s world. My mini-van theory remains uncontested. Oh yeah, and I stopped by Starbucks to celebrate.