- No one in my family has any interest in the color of the crap I am coughing up.
- I use being sick as an excuse not to do anything – and will continue to do so as long as I can get away with it.
- When your doctor says to you: “You look like shit,” you probably should take that as an indication that you really need to take a couple days off work.
- I have to moan really loud and really often before my knee surgery patient husband will come limping into the bedroom asking if I need anything. (Which I usually didn’t but wanted the attention. His doctor told him he needed to walk on his knee as much as possible so I am actually helping in his recuperation).
- My dog thinks it’s a treat to be able to go back to bed in the middle of the day.
- No matter how sick I am, my children will still never make dinner.
- I can’t deal with pantyhose when I am sick. In fact, elastic band pants is the only work clothes I can wear without whining.
- I have finally perfected spitting out of the car. This includes stopping, removing seat belt and leaning way out. I am simply not able to spit out of the car window while driving no matter how much guidance I received from my son.
- I am not allowed to leave snotty Kleenex on the bed. Ever.
- One can easily spend hundreds of dollars on sinus medicine that does absolutely nothing.