What I Learned About Cruise Ships

So we are back to the c-c-c-cold state of Ohio after a wonderful two-week vacation.  Don’t worry, I won’t share all our vacation photos and CERTAINLY WILL NOT share the underwater video of my butt descending into the ocean down a really long ladder.  The last time I was on a cruise, my now-adult children were sent to the ship daycare just to give you an idea of how long it has been.  But I did learn a few things:

  • The boat makes money with pictures.  Lots and lots of pictures = Lots and lots of money. Because it is so cheap to make them and then they charge $20 bucks to take them home.  But I have to give my husband credit; he didn’t bitch once about having to pose for all our photos.  And I totally bought them all.


  • There just should be a law that children under the age of three are not allowed on cruise ships. That or have enough sound proofed rooms that we can’t hear them. 
  • I think I took more photos of the towel-animals than of the scenic island shots:

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA(I have about 15 more of an elephant, lotus flower, cat, and giraffe but I restrained myself).

  • I learned that the average person gains 1.5 pounds per day on a cruise.  So I gained 10 pounds.  But I cannot confirm that because there is no way in hell I am going to step onto a scale for the next few months.  (Damn that Pirates Pizza that was open at 2 am every day!)
  • They sell A TON of watches.  Why?  Because they know that once we set sail, no one is going to want to pay $2,000 in roaming charges traveling out of the country.  So you have to have a regular watch to always stay on “boat time.”  We were lucky. I have a watch that I wear purely for decoration and it was the most used item the entire trip.  But boy did they make some bucks selling a ton a watches in the gift shop!
  • The cups sucked.  The only free drinks were tea, lemonade and tap water.  And all they had were tiny plastic cups.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERASo even I had to pay $16 bucks for a stupid bigger cup.

We had a blast and I now have a tan that will last exactly two days and will fade as soon as it realizes I am no longer near the sun.  I do have much more to share. Don’t worry – no pictures of me in a bathing suit.  I have my standards.

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