(again, random use of numbers for professional clarity only)
- I thought it was a marble on the living room rug. And then I picked it up. It was a purple froot loop.
- My friend said her jeans ripped in the crotch at work. I texted her to use a stapler. Then suggested that if I were her, I would immediately leave work and go home citing “female problems” to my boss.
- There is this really cool toy called a “Catapencil.” I have no idea why it hit the “Worst Toy List” on MSN.com. Even better – I am sending these to all my nieces and nephews for a Christmas present.
- My daughter spent a lot of time going through all her stuffed animals as she prepared to move out into her new apt. After the garbage bag was filled, I put it in the pile to take with her. Except she said, “Mom, I am 22 years old. I am NOT taking all those stuffed animals with me. You need to keep them here.” Sigh.
- Her roommate, Paris thought her dad was coming over to see the new apt and get a tour of her new place. And then Paris found out he had filled up the van with all her stuff from home and we all had to help carry it inside.
- My husband shoveled the snow this week. Except he did not shovel my path to the garbage cans. And we argued about it. So the garbage bag got thrown over the fence that I couldn’t open. And then raccoons got into it and made a mess. Don’t let anyone kid you – THIS is what happens after almost 30 years of marriage. (And then you send your kid outside to clean up the mess).
- If the president of the United States decided that he didn’t want the job anymore, can he just quit? So, exactly who would they send their resignation letter to? Could he say, “Well, I thought I wanted this job, but it is way too %$#@! difficult, so I quit!”