Ten Blog Posts I REALLY wanted to write in 2014 but didn’t.

Here are ten blog posts that I had every intention of writing in 2014 but for some reason, never made it:

  1. My niece’s wedding on a boat in Florida.  Totally awesome wedding and Laura’s dress totally hid the pregnancy. (For the record, it is also a great story that Steven proposed to her and then the very next day discovered they were going to be parents).  I was pretty impressed with the size of the bathrooms and still have my little fabric wrapped jelly bellies.  Fine I have EIGHT fabric wrapped jelly bellies – I wanted extra; shoot me.  I was a bit disappointed that other folks in the boats passing by us would wave to my 21-year-old daughter but totally ignore me.  And most important – Welcome Baby Liam!  My little drooly new nephew!
  2. The Santana concert.  I got my daughter to come along with my husband and I to the concert.  She asked me what songs Santana sang.  Which I could not answer.  Christina did think it was pretty neat that old people could actually afford to buy the beer and food she said no one her age ever did.  And the old man dancing away next to us was pretty comical. For the record, my daughter said if either of us got up and danced, she was most definitely leaving.  Which wasn’t as good as…
  3. The Katy Perry PRISM concert.  One of the best I have seen.  Totally entertaining despite the 13,000 screaming tweenagers.  Kudos out to the dad’s who brought them.  And we got to totally photo bomb the couple in front of us.
  4. Finding new names for bands using items from Home Depot.  Now, this little exercise totally freaked out my husband.  All I was suggesting was names like:  “Lubricating Oil” or “Hex Nut” or “Vinyl Plug” and all I got back was instructions to immediately cease and stop the exercise. No teamwork whatsoever. Sigh.
  5. How to begin writing a novel. You notice I did not say to actually WRITE A NOVEL.  I have to build up to this so I figure I need to just start out with a small plan and then build from there.
  6. My father-in-law’s home.  Where the temperature hovers around 84 degrees (I am in bliss, my husband is sweating 10 pounds off per day at least).  Vince’s  21-year-old cat just had a hairball the size of a grapefruit surgically removed.  Vince has rugs all over his carpet, towels and sheets covering his furniture, plastic wrap covering his pictures and (I swear) spice from 1956 that turned to dust when all I did was open it.  (He swore it was still good).  I am still not over having to travel to the Walgreen’s down the road to use the bathroom facilities.  Took the entire weekend for my husband to fix the plumbing.  We keep leaving blank signed checks for Vince to call folks and pay for work to be done.  He keeps telling us his life is way too busy.  He is 85 and all he does all day is listen to NPR.
  7. Our crappy summer where it never got warm enough to go swimming, AND there never was enough sun to ward off that lack of needing sunshine feeling.  Which ran right into the gloomy winter season.  Oh, and after two years I still haven’t finished planting my lilac seedlings.
  8. Finally coming out with my “true” relationship with “Kyle from lab.”  I had been working on a special project converting all our old VHS tapes to DVD’s and I found Kyle on Craigslist.  I  would give the tapes to Kyle in the parking lot of some agreed upon restaurant.  He would give me back the ones he finished and I would pay him.  It felt rather like a drug deal or the beginning of an affair that was never going to happen.  Luckily my husband never caught on (I had to make several clandestine meetings over the summer and fall) and it was a great Christmas present for him.  We got to watch home movies and hear my daughter exclaim “I was SUCH A CUTE BABY!” over and over again.  It will be nice not to have to sneak around to meet a man without my husband knowing. Then again, did I mention that Kyle texted my husband by mistake: “Can we meet at 5 pm instead of 6 pm tonight?” and all my husband did was forward the message to my phone.  Not a word said.  That’s why I love that guy. (My husband, not Kyle)
  9. My long weekend in Amish Country.  Okay, it was supposed to be a long 4-day weekend.  And then I couldn’t get Thursday off work so it was a 3-day weekend.  And then something came up on Friday so actually it was just the weekend.  My total take from this special weekend was my husband trying his best to avoid driving his Camaro over the piles of horse poop in the road.  And I bought way too much crap.  But boy did I feel skinny at the all you can eat Amish restaurant and buffet!
  10. My colonoscopy.  Wait.  I didn’t have a colonoscopy in 2014.  Boy did everyone dodge a big one on my chronicling THAT event.  Which, BTW now my doctor is bringing up some “other alternatives.”  Ah, no. Sorry.  Not feeling like 2015 is the year, either. But thanks for your concern.

 

 

 

One response to “Ten Blog Posts I REALLY wanted to write in 2014 but didn’t.

  1. Yay! She is back, I missed your posts. I need to find someone like Kyle!

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