Everybody knows that when you move, you have a massive garage sale to get rid of all your unwanted items; i.e. junk. And you do this because you certainly do not want to expend energy and money in moving a bunch of stuff that you have accumulated over the years and know you are not going to ever need or use.
So I had a HUGE garage sale with a ton of stuff. I am talking 8 suitcases, books, tote bags, arts and craft supplies, computer and electronic items, holiday decorations, linens, various knickknacks, shoes, A TON of clothes (which never sell) and odds and ends such as a small desk, dresser, ladder, various garage stuff, a broken lawn mower (I did have the part), metal shelving, snow removal items (Thank heavens we are NEVER going to need THOSE again!) and a stove that worked perfect but we replaced with a new stainless steel one to match the rest of the appliances in the kitchen.
So here I was, having a garage sale in rural Ohio. My garage sale notice was posted on Craigslist with lots of pictures. And I am a master at the sign game. I had my fluorescent green poster signs with big black arrows made well in advance and put out the night before my sale at all the pertinent corners. I moved all the cars onto the grass so there was lots of room for customers in our driveway. I put balloons out by the road in front of the house. And then I waited. And waited. My first customers were my neighbor’s kids. I gave them everything they wanted for free. I don’t think their mom appreciated it; if I remember correctly she told me they had enough stuff and didn’t need any more. But all that meant to me was that I had to be more sneaky as I gave her boys stuff to take home in secret.
And I had the talkers who wanted to visit more than buy. I had the guy who wanted the huge discount and while he thought he was a master negotiator, I knew that I would have given him all that stuff for free. The goal wasn’t to make money; it was to just glad to get rid of stuff.
One lady picked up a purse and then put it back down
“You can’t do that.” I told her “Once you touch it, you have to take it for free. It’s a rule.” It worked. One more item gone.
At the end of the first day while I felt like it went pretty good, I didn’t really see much of a dent in the number of items left. I half-heartedly covered up what was left with some tarps and went inside. I pretty much left everything out hoping someone would come by and steal it all in the middle of the night. But we weren’t in Las Vegas anymore where they routinely steal from garage sales (true story). In rural Ohio everyone is pretty honest.
Toward the end of the second day of the sale, another neighbor asked if he could take the good stuff that was left to sell at his future garage sale. “Absolutely,” I told him. “Feel free to take it all.” (He just took some suitcases – not much help to me at all. Wait. Does that mean the rest of my stuff is not good?)
In the end I made maybe $100. I called the Veteran’s Association who sent a truck and gladly hauled all the rest of my stuff away giving me that special form for my taxes.
I was so glad that was over and really felt like I had accomplished quite a bit for the weekend. I never did show my husband the for sale sign I made for his car. This is what happens when you are bored and don’t have many garage sale customers. Neither of my kids thought it was a good idea. Well, except for Casey. I am pretty sure he thought it was funny.